Benning's Journey

Here I come with a quarter-life crisis and many questions are popping up to my mind about life, graduate, jobs, thesis, boyfriend, family, and many more. As I come through this journey, in this stage of life I faced huge insecurity. Realizing myself is no longer that teenager that able to spend my 24/7 to chill nor to have fun. I have a huge plan to execute inside my mind. Then many more questions from my inner souls just come up and it goes along with the “what if questions”.  What if I fail to reach what I expect? What if I will be the only one who cants survive? What if my fate ends up useless? What if……. What if …….. What if ……… And many more. I tried to do some projections towards my future and what is my life vision for the next five years. I highly hope it will work someday. I am sure that a final year student like me has experienced this mixed feeling. There is a lot of millennial like me has started their startup and some of them already become the founder (CEO)

1. Bless The Broken Road - Rascal Flatts 2. Beautiful - Bazzi feat Camila Cabello 3. Way Back Home - Shaun feat Conor Maynard 4. Thank you, Next - Arianna Grande 5. Tequila - Covered by Endless summer music 6. Running Low - Shawn Mendes 7. Lemonade - Jeremy 8. Forever and ever amen - Randy Travis (Covered by Endless summer music) 9. In case you didn't know - Brett Young 10. This is what it takes - Shawn Mendes

It’s a cold night with the rain outside. I am looking to my “to do list” note, and I notice that I have several works to get done (important but not urgent stuff). One of my resolutions in 2019 is maintaining my self-management to be as productive as possible. So, here I am sitting in front of a work desk with a well-set laptop, and ready to make those things done. While I am open up my laptop, and I look into my green name tag that currently hanging on my wall with the word YOLO (You only live once) sticking on that old memorable thing. I remember that my senior told me to write down the most favorite quote of all time on my name tag when the university orientation just started. I do strongly remember the terms YOLO, the word that I and some of my friends in senior high school often mention enjoying life when everything gets harder. “ YOLO guys, YOLO”. At that moment, I just feel like this YOLO quote is totally representing my life. Brave, happy, goal getter, and confident young